but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
