What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
