I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
where am i from again
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
