Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
