don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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