Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
