I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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