There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
