One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Are we still banned from the library?
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
