I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Randomize