this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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