I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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