Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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