I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
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