what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Randomize
