this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
i love accidental penises.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
