yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize
