It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize
