idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
