Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...