i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
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