it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Randomize
