took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
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