have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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