Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
