you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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