you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
So much rum. So many feels.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
