You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
