As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Randomize
