after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
