i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Randomize
