we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Randomize
