like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
third nipple confirmed
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
