how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?