ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
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Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
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I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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