I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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