the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
