Who did Billy Mays play for?
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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