who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
Randomize
