She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This beer is not sobering me up at all
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
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