is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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