Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
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