Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Randomize
