sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
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she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize