By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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