Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
