when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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