You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
