I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Houston, we have a squirter
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Randomize
