I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Randomize
