Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
