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• (773): View more from Illinois

  I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.

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• (254): View more from Texas

  I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.

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• (845): View more from New York

  hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.

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• (870): View more from Arkansas

  I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.

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• (864): View more from South Carolina

  I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."

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  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  We're not piercing ourselves today.

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• (917): View more from New York City

  I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.

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• (310): View more from California

  Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)

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• (309): View more from Illinois

  So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated

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• (618): View more from Illinois

  In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina

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