Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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