Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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